Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Que sera sera.....

Life can be crazy. Some things happen to us and we have no clue why. But based on my experiences so far in my short life, I have learned to see that everything happens in life for a reason. People in your life are there for a reason, season, or forever. I've learned to accept this concept and trust God. Sure you can sit around and mope about crap that don't go right, but why? It's gonna happen anyway so you gotta just pray to God that you find meaning out of your circumstances and make the best out of the situation your in.

So many things happened to me recently that put my life into perspective. I don't feel like I completely figured it out yet, but I'm well on my way. I took a trip to my home country, Jamaica, recently. I was excited because I haven't been there in years. When I went, things had changed dramatically!!! Of course the island itself is still as beautiful as I remembered, but life had changed drastically for the people. Everything was so expensive with the tax being dramatically increased. Basic need items like toothbrush, toothpaste, tissue, food, etc. were soooooo expensive that I wondered how the people got by w/o having many jobs available. But my people always find a way to survive. I spent the night at cousins, aunts, and different family members house and got a chance to hear their experiences and the issues that were going on. My cousin told me a story of how it was hard to go to college because school was outrageously expensive and they had to pay a weekly fee. If you could not afford to take classes and borrowed a school loan, you had to pay it back within a few years or else the government would throw you in jail. Now living in the U.S.-a country built on dept- hearing this was absurd! How could the government throw you in jail for trying to better your education??? I felt so ungrateful when I heard this information. Here I was in a country (US) with so many opportunities and FINANCIAL AID and I was playing. Sure I'm in college pursuing a career, but I'm NOT doing all that I can. If I worked to my full potential I would have straight A's in school. But I keep playing and not understanding how lucky I am. When I went back to my old school and saw how they didnt have any computers or so many things we take for granted here, I felt stupid. So many children there are so willing to learn and have dreams, but they had no way of making them happen. One day I stayed at my cousins house and they told me about the violence that was happening in Jamaica. I was unaware that it was that bad. I dont want you guys to think that Jamaica is just the most violent place, it's still beautiful, but every country has their problems...even the land of opportunity (US). But I saw how much my family struggle there. They don't even have a simple inside bathroom with running water and plumbing, and many did not have inside kitchens with gas for cooking so they used coal, which is an asthmatic's nightmare . I could go on and on.

My experience just showed me that I have so many opportunities to spread my wings and become a success. An opportunity so many would kill for or get killed for. So many people risk their lives trying to cross the US border daily. But the people here are playing. My problem is that sometimes I find it hard to become motivated, but my recent epiphanies and realizations are motivation enough. I see how hard my dad work in the sun and I want to be better for my family. Sometimes I wonder "Why me GOD?? Why did you save me??" That's how I know that I have somewhere that God needs me to be; I have an undiscovered purpose in this life. I know that I'm smart, but I just gotta start believing in myself and work to my full potential.It's funny how my family believes in me so much and think that I can become anything, but I don't believe in myself at times or get lazy. But I do believe in Destiny. The Lord has a plan for all our lives. The person your meant to be with, the career or job your meant to do will happen. It may be delayed by circumstances, or even by YOU. But problems are always going to happen in life, you just have to face them, move on, and overcome. Lately, sometimes I want to cry when things happen, but I don't (not b/c I can't have emotions), but because I know it's for a reason. Remember "God won't put you through what he can't take you through." Don't know who came up with that, but when I look back at my life, my experiences have been for a reason and have made me a better, stronger, and smarter person.
I also learned that you have to learn to appreciate the people in your life that are good to you and accept you for you. As humans, we always look for perfection and think that the "grass is greener on the other side," when it's usually not. I'm not condoning that you accept people in your life just to be safe for fear of being alone or not having anyone else (in this case the grass ain't even green to begin with)...sometimes it's a good idea to get to know "me" before you let another in. But you should look around more often and appreciate the people that care about you, despite their imperfection. We all fall short by HIM, so why condemn each other for what we are all guilty of..SIN. So as they say, "Que sera sera." Whatever will be, will be. This phrase is one of my favorites because it's saying, let life happen. Love the people your with because you don't know when your last day will be. Our days are numbered on Earth and anything can happen, so why live your life being hateful and regretful?

Sidenote: I recently bought this book by Zane called "Total Eclipse of the Heart." This book is AMAZING!!! It ties in with the theme of my article because it just shows you that in life, whatever is meant to happen will happen. If you love a good romance novel, you will enjoy this novel. I finished reading it in two days!!! But it showed me that your not in control of  relationships or life. Yes you can control who you do or don't go out with, but not ultimately. If someone is meant for you, they will come in your life at the right time. So if your looking for a good PG-16 love story, then this book is for u enjoy.

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